I'm in a precarious position.

As founder of the Seattle Disc Jockey Association, I want to unite local DJ's to facilitate networking, education and having some fun. I don't want to make enemies.

But occasionally I have to cry "bullshit" when I see a local DJ take contemptuous shots at our industry.

6:42 PM: Don starts out nice enough with his Craigslist tout:

Take Notice! I’m not your every day DJ!
Reply to: oneoclockjump@hotmail.com
Date: 2007-11-12, 6:42PM PST

Marketing? Yuk! Every year I have to do this. Something I’m not the best at. What I’m good at is being an Oldies DJ. Well yeah, sure I play the newer music, doesn’t everybody? Classic Rock and Soul from the 50’s, 60’s, 70’s & 80’s is what I am best at. Theme Parties from Sock Hops, Surfing Beach Parties on up to Disco Dance Parties! The oldies mixed with some country and newer music is a perfect blend for Wedding Receptions. And for those who like Country, I have a library second to none. Requests! You bet! And if by the odd chance I don’t have the song you want and you let me know in advance, I can get it!

Don Buzzell (Buzz), 1 O’clock Jump! (phone number)

6:43 PM: What's this? Only 60 seconds later it must occur to Don how much he really really hates marketing. And how he also doesn't think much of his DJ skills with phrases like "doesn't everybody?" Sure, but how do YOU make what "everybody" does more entertaining, more special, more ... you? Why should they call Don instead of the next person? I know...it's because he's CHEAP!

How many expensive DJ’s does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Reply to: oneoclockjump@hotmail.com
Date: 2007-11-12, 6:43PM PST

Answer: One, The expensive DJ stands still and the world revolves around him or her.
For a reliable DJ at a reasonable price give me a call. Playing all types of music but specializing in the oldies.

6:46 PM: Three more minutes pass and Don comes to a fevered pitch. His head is swirling. Why he isn't getting more gigs? Why aren't the people who he's done work for before calling him back? After all, people want a low price most of all, don't they? So he fires off...

Some DJ’s are out there running a SCAM!!!
Reply to: oneoclockjump@hotmail.com
Date: 2007-11-12, 6:46PM PST

A large number of DJ’s are trying to convince people that they need to spend $800 or more on a DJ for their wedding reception, holiday party, birthday party or whatever to get a great DJ. These DJ’s are trying to make a living off of working 1-2 nights a week. Does this make sense? I think not! My day job pays well. Don’t get me wrong I’m in it to make money, but I’m not in it to screw people. I’m damn good at what I do. So, If your looking for the best bang for the buck when it comes to a DJ give me a call.

So that's my precarious position, Don. I'd like nothing more than for you to be a participating member of the Seattle Disc Jockey Association. But now I've called you out on all this stupid shit and you probably hate me. Oh wait, the line for that forms to the right!

Yeah, it was me who replied anonymously on Craigslist.

Re: Some DJ’s are out there running a SCAM!!!
Reply to: serv-477270383@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-11-12, 11:27PM PST

In your search for a fun and professional DJ this holiday season, here's a funny example.

Do you think Barry Manilow gets paid the same amount as a karaoke singer that does Barry Manilow songs? Of course not! Barry has real talent and experience and simply does a better show.

If all DJ's were the same, why wouldn't you get the cheapest one?

But they're not. Some $300 newbies are worth exactly that. Some $500 DJ's are adequate for pushing play. In fact, DJ's like this might be all you need for your event.

But there's a reason why party planners and major hotels and banquet directors avoid cheap DJ's. It makes them look bad when their clients complain.

It's not always about price, it's about value. All DJ's do not do the same thing. There's a difference between a sound technician and a real entertainer.

Do your homework and you won't get scammed.

Yeah, maybe Barry is a little cheesy but he's making a helluva comeback. Feel free to insert the star of your choice, and the point is still the same.

I'd still like you to come to our Holiday Networking and Spinoff on November 21. Where you can network with other local DJ's and trade those dreaded marketing ideas. Or learn how to identify the best thing about YOU so that you're not the "doesn't everybody?" guy. Or even better, sell yourself on your own merits and not by putting others down. Charge what you want, but saying your fellow DJ's are running a "scam" because they feel their fair market price might be [gasp] $800? (Mine's $1200.) As George Gershwin wrote, "Nice work if you can get it, and you can get it if you try!"

If you don't punch me out, maybe we can even can share a drink and talk about how it's not that you make plenty on your day job (I do too!) but not to hold in contempt something that you yourself could achieve ... with the right friends.